Is Therapy Right For Me?

5 Signs It Might Be Time to Talk to Someone

By: Sarah Biren, At Perez Therapy, LLC

Kevin Turcios - Taking the first step starts with a question

I am so glad you are here. It is completely normal to question whether or not therapy is right for you (and as a psychotherapist, I do not use the word “normal” lightly). Before we go any further, I’d like to make two things crystal clear.

It is absolutely okay to question therapy. In fact, that questioning might be your very first step. Kind of like scanning DoorDash (this is not sponsored) before deciding if you’re in the mood for sushi or spaghetti, or if you even are hungry enough to order food. It is normal, it is smart, and it means you are paying attention to what you need.

You do not need to be falling apart to go to therapy. There’s no secret bouncer at the door asking, “Are you emotionally wrecked enough to enter?” Therapy isn’t just for breakdowns, it’s also for breakthroughs, check-ins, and those “I don’t know what I’m feeling but something is definitely going on” kinds of moments.

So, let’s talk about it. No pressure. No assumptions. Just real curiosity and honesty. Here are five signs it might be time to talk to a therapist. 

1. You’re Tired of Navigating Things Alone THIS. 

You show up to work, feed yourself (most days), text your friends back (eventually), and maybe even water your plants (shout out to those resilient succulents). But there’s an emotional deflatedness that keeps creeping in, the kind that comes from holding it all together without anyone else really seeing the full picture. That constant sense of "I guess I’ll just figure it out on my own…again…” can start to wear thin. Sometimes your inner monologue needs a second voice to make sense of the noise. 

Therapy can be a place where you don’t have to figure it all out on your own. It’s okay to let someone else help you make sense of things. I know. That word, help. That one little word can come with a surprising emotional punch. But I want to be clear. Asking for help does not mean you are failing or something is wrong with you. It just means you’re human. And if you’ve gotten to the point where you’re running on empty, reaching out might actually be the strongest move you can make. Strength is knowing when to let someone in. Emotional six-pack territory. 

2. You Want to Feel Seen and Heard

I don’t mean this as a fluffy idea. I’m talking about actually feeling seen and heard. 

Venting to your friends, your family, your partner, or even your uber driver can feel somewhat satisfying. But there’s a difference between someone nodding along while you unload and someone really seeing you. Wanting that level of support does not make you needy. It means you’re wired for connection. Like all of us. We all need somewhere we don’t feel the need to downplay our feelings or sum them up in a meme-worthy sentence. Somewhere we don’t have to be “fine,” curate what we say to avoid judgment, or make it make sense right away.

Therapy can offer just that. Having someone who is trained to listen deeply. Someone who knows how to hold space in a way that even your ride-or-die bestie (not to reduce the immense value of a late-night ice cream sesh) might not always be able to. Someone who won’t rush to fix, compare, or sugar coat your pain into a silver lining. Someone who shows up. Someone who stays curious. Someone who notices how you’re holding it all together. The weight of it. The impact of it. Because sometimes what we need most isn’t someone to solve it, but someone to sit with us in the mess.

Nguyen Dang Hoang Nhu - If you've been holding it together, maybe start to wonder why

3. When Saying “I’m Fine” Is Just A Habit, Not The Truth

Ah. The classic, “I’m fine.”

We’ve all used it. Sometimes, it just feels easier to say “I’m fine” rather than trying to explain what you’re really feeling. Especially when you’re not even sure what you’re feeling yourself. Maybe nothing feels obviously “wrong,” but nothing feels obviously “right” either. Maybe you're overwhelmed but can’t explain why. Maybe what once felt exciting or meaningful now just falls flat. Or maybe you just feel disconnected. Numb.

That what-in-the-world-is-going-on place? Therapists are trained to meet you right there. Therapists are not looking for a neat and tidy story. They’re listening for what is left unsaid inside your “I’m fine.” In fact, sometimes the most healing thing is simply having a space where you don’t have to pretend you already know what’s going on or what you're feeling. Just a place to start exploring it. Sometimes the best kind of fine is the kind you can say out loud without having to fake it.

4. Your Coping Strategies Are Starting to Turn Into Coping Crutches

This one hits home. Truly, no judgment here. Binge-watching reality TV? (Same.) Doom-scrolling into the middle of the night? (Right there with you.) Pinning feel-good quotes like you’re microdosing hope? (Especially when cute animals are involved? Oh yes.)

Let’s be clear: these coping strategies are valid strategies. You’re doing what’s worked, what’s helped ease the weight of the day. And that matters! The thing is, if your coping strategies are starting to feel like the only thing that is keeping you steady, that’s something worth paying attention to. If you’re dodging your feelings like emotional dodgeballs (coming from someone who’s usually first out, no shame), maybe it’s time to stop running and get curious about what’s actually coming your way.

That’s where therapy can come in. Not to take your coping strategies away, but to help you understand them. Therapy can be the safe space to slow down and help you get curious about where those strategies came from, what they’ve been protecting you from, and whether or not they’re still actually working for you. It’s also okay to outgrow the tools that once got you through. Therapy helps you figure out what you might need now, while still honoring what you got you this far.

5. You Want To Grow, Not Just Push Through

Life happens. And sometimes, when it rains, you’re looking for a cozy place to recharge, not just to stay dry.

Maybe you’re going through something big like a breakup, a job shift, a loss, or a messy family fallout. Maybe you’re going through something more internal like crying in the shower for no clear reason or snapping at your uber driver for taking the wrong turn…again. Visible or not, wherever you are, matters.

Ways to “push through” can almost sound like a broken record. Leaning on sayings like “everything happens for a reason” or “time heals all wounds” can evoke more frustration than genuine healing. The spoiler? You’re not looking for a shortcut through the hard stuff. You’re not asking for a quick fix or a motivational quote to gloss over what you’re really feeling. You’re craving a space to really be in it. The in-between. The part where things are still raw, confusing, or just gray.

Therapy is where you can land when you’re not ready to “move on” but don’t want to stay stuck either. There’s no timeline. No timer. No emotional stopwatch waiting to buzz. Just room to be real, take your time, and figure things out at your own pace, even if you’re not entirely sure where you’re headed. Sometimes, the desire to feel different is enough reason to begin. No big epiphany required.

Mitch Unsplash

So…Is It Time?

Take a moment and really ask yourself: 

• Do you feel tired of having to carry it all on your own?

• Are you longing for someone to really get it, not just nod along?

• Are the comforts that used to help starting to feel less helpful?

• Do you want something to shift, even if you’re not sure what or how?

• Are you just bone-deep tired?

If you’re nodding your head (even if it’s just a little), therapy could be a helpful next step. Not because you’re failing. Not because you’re doing something wrong. Not because you’re too much. Because it is okay to ask for support, the kind that meets you right where you are and walks alongside you to where you want to go. You don’t need to wait for rock bottom. You don’t need a dramatic meltdown or a catastrophic event to “justify” seeking therapy. You want to feel seen, understood, and supported? That is human. Sometimes, the most powerful reason to begin therapy is simply: I want to feel better. And that’s reason enough.

So, still questioning? Good! Keep questioning. It’s a sign of your self-awareness. Let yourself notice what thoughts or feelings bubble up in the process. And if you’re right at the edge of maybe I should talk to someone, consider this your friendly, inviting nudge.  

Therapy isn’t about being broken or having all the answers; it’s about being human. It’s about curiosity, compassion, and willingness to explore. It’s a space where you don’t have to have it all figured out. And most importantly, you don’t have to do it alone. Whatever you're carrying, there’s room for it.

Your healing, your clarity, your peace?

That’s all yours.

And you are worthy of it all.